From Loser to Cruiser

 

Hey everybody! So as you all know, I currently ride a GMC Denali 700c Road Bike, purchased from a local Wal-Mart! (The pink cruiser in the background is the wifey's) And personally, I love my bike! So lately I've been hearing some people talking about how horrid of a bike it is and how it isn't worth upgrading. Enter Sir Flat Broke Ironman to the rescue! Because, you see, I fully intend to ride the Denali into the ground, until it's either totalled or my financial situation improves to the point where I can afford a decent tri-bike! So this is a quick guide to show you through what I intend to do with the Denali in the next few years how to make your own clunker road bike match the space-age bike snobs!

1. Clipless Pedals

If you read my earlier review of the Denali, you know it comes with flats. Which is a MAJOR problem as far as bike speed and power efficiency goes. I understand the logic, most people buying an intro level road bike need to get used to simply riding a road bike and that's much easier to do without wiping out due to clipless issues.  So step one for my bike and hopefully yours, is going to be to install a clipless pedal system to increase overall cycling power. I'm looking at installing these bad boys http://www.amazon.com/Venzo-Shimano-Cycling-Bicycle-Pedals/dp/B00D9B7FOQ/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1385435762&sr=8-3-fkmr1&keywords=clipless+pedal+venzo. Remember, you need shoes, cleats, and the pedals to make the system go! I'm looking at adding this to my bike around late January or February.

2. Clip-on Aero Bars

This is basically a temp fix until I can get integrated aero bars. These basically just clamp onto your handlebars and adjust to a modified aero position. I intend to install these at the same time as the clipless pedals, all of which should help you (and hopefully me) look closer to the athletes on $6,000 bikes. Quick tip: The same tape you use on baseball bats works great on keeping sweaty hands from slipping on aero bars. And it's cheap.

3. High-pressure Slicks and Presta Tubes with Adaptors

The Denali came standard with 700x32 low-pressure hybrid tires. Not bad for intermediate roads but definitely not race material. I'll be upgrading these before my Ironman to high-pressure (100-120 psi) slick racing tires. I'll probably be shrinking the width slightly too. The Denali also came with Schrader valve tubes to make it more commercially viable to a public used to Schrader valves, so those all have to go to be replaced with Presta. And since the rims are drilled for Schrader, they all need rim adapters ($0.65 on Amazon) to keep the valves from tearing loose. High pressure tires reduce your rolling resistance and will help make your clunker more aerodynamic.

4. Wedge Box Top Tube Bag

This is more of an accessory than an upgrade and I'll probably be doing this one in spring when I start going back out for extremely long rides (they're only $10 at Wal-Mart) Another trick learned by watching the father-in-law, he uses one to store immediate nutrition since reaching behind you in aero bars is fraught with peril.

5. Quill-Stem to Threadless Adaptor

If you own a bike with a quill-stem, you know what a pain in the arse it is to find new handlebars. So to fix that problem, you can install an adapter that then allows you to use threadless handlebars with your bike which greatly opens up the possibilities. Eventually I'll grab one from Amazon and fix my handlebar situation which brings us to...

6. Handlebars and Drop Bar Shifters

The Denali comes with extremely heavy and heavily customized handlebars, which have quite literally been cut in half to have mountain bike shifters installed. So replacing these with carbon-fiber bars would be an extreme improvement. Since I eventually intend to install integrated aero-bars, the adaptor is a necessity and bar-end shifters are going to become a must have. If you have some basic bike tune-up skills, this won't be a major project but we'll see how it goes when I'm trying it out! ;)

7. Deep Dish Wheels

This is a long shot since decent racing wheels would cost me 4x more than the bike did, but if you can ever find a great deal on a set of racing wheels, you can greatly lighten your bike and decrease resistance. For me, a new set of wheels would also be the easiest way to get quick-release skewers on my bike!

8. Adjustable Saddle Post

Also a long shot due to cost, but the straight-bar saddle post on the Denali leaves the available positions somewhat lacking. An adjustable saddle post would indeed fix these problems and allow for greater range of motion but they're also expensive. Although speaking from experience, the saddle post in the Denali weighs an entire pound all by itself so a carbon-fiber post could shave some weight.

9. Drivetrain

The Denali's drivetrain is somewhat lacking as the gear ratios and cassette it uses are the same as for mountain bikes, topping off your gear-based mileage at a sub-par area. When these wear out, I definitely plan to replace the cassette and upgrade to a lighter, more weight-efficient drivetrain. This is an excellent way to both gain gearing power and shave off a few kilos.

10. Frame

Eventually, if I have invested all this money already in the bike, I will want to replace the frame with a lighter one to shave off the last few possible kilos! Just remember, although the components may change the bike itself keeps on living!

So that's essentially my master plan to help you take the old clunker and match it with the space-age bikes of the new cycling generation. Always remember, in Ironman especially, it's your heart that makes the difference. The best equipment in the world won't save you if you're heart isn't strong enough to say "dammit I won't quit," whether it's mile 1 or 115!  Now let's get back to racing!